Monday, May 18, 2015

WARNING! WARNING! WARNING!

PORTLAND WARNING:

It has been established that DANAVA and LEBENDEN TOTEN have returned to life and will commit acts of murder this Thursday at Blackwater. A widespread investigation of funeral homes, morgues, and hospitals has concluded that DANAVA and LEBENDEN TOTEN will be returning to Blackwater and seeking human victims. It's hard for us here to be reporting this to you, but it does seem to be a fact...

Tuesday, May 12, 2015

THE MAN FROM HONG KONG

Everyone knows that the massive red-curtained screen, refurbished seats that embrace your ass like a goddamn velvet glove and finely pruned beer garden makes Hollywood Theatre the best place to watch movies in Portland. What some people might not realize is that under the watchful eye of Executive Director Doug Whyte, the Hollywood has become much more than a movie theater and everyone's favorite living room away from home. It has become an invaluable stronghold of creativity and inspiration in the sea of bullshit that is Portland these days. To be sure, there's a lot to bitch about in Portland these days. But the Hollywood Theatre sure ain't one of 'em. Doug and his crew are visionary patrons of the arts. They are supportive of new ideas, challenging programming and a radical reimagining of what community theater can and should be. You should be proud of that and you should support it with your money or your time as a volunteer (those people serving you beer don't get paid, so treat them right and fucking TIP!). 

Remember when the great John Fassano (R.I.P.) came and introduced Black Roses? Genius! Remember when Thor came and introduced Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare and then performed a bunch of songs on stage while the audience screamed, "ENERRRRGYYYYY!!!!"? An invincible evening. Maybe you saw Nina Simone's incendiary 1976 performance in Montreux or were lucky enough to experience Fred and Toody Cole blasting through an acoustic career retrospective live on stage after a screening of the Dead Moon documentary or caught The Secret Life of Plants and learned about "ecstatic truth" from my good friend Eric Isaacson? Were you there when WYRD WAR got to invade the Hollywood with Halloween 3 on 35mm and horror soundtrack composer Alan Howarth performed his music live on stage? Someday we might look back on this moment of Portland's ugly transformation and recognize the Hollywood Theatre for what it is. It is the CBGBs of contemporary Portland. It is the fuckin' Weimar of the Pacific Northwest. 

What the hell was I even talking about? Oh yeah, so tonight Hollywood Theater's sleaziest curator and my etseemed colleague, Mr. Dan Halsted, proudly presents what is rumored to be the only surviving 35mm print of THE MAN FROM HONG KONG with...wait for it...director Brian Trenchard-Smith in attendance! That's right. The man responsible for Stunt Rock, Turkey Shoot, BMX Bandits, Dead End Drive-In and Leprechaun 3 is in Portland tonight! In the spirit of total confession, I've never even seen The Man From Hong Kong. I guess I could've watched it on Youtube so I had something smart to write here, but that would've felt like cheating and after all the drugs I consumed Saturday night I really can't look at a computer screen for 90 minutes anyway. I did watch the trailer and I know we're in for some classy 70s culture wars, barrel-chested male chauvinism, exploding car crashes, awkward dialogue and enough 10 minute fight scenes to require multiple trips to the beer garden. The poster says it's "FAST! FANTASTIC! FUN!" Whatever. See you tonight. DO NOT MISS THIS!!!!


Friday, May 01, 2015

To The Fairest...



I very rarely drag my private family life into this public cesspool, but it's May Day and I am simply too proud to contain myself. My beautiful and brilliant daughter completed her final academic day of high school TODAY and has been accepted to her top choice college. Anyone who knows me in real life knows what this means to my family and wholly understands the sacrifice and struggle that led to this precise moment in time. Let's hear it for the radiant Daughter of Discordia whose shining path now unfolds before her! Time to fly with wings held high, Little Black Angel...

Tuesday, April 07, 2015

THE RETURN OF THE IRON MESSIAH!!!!



PREPARE YOURSELF FOR...THE RETURN OF THE IRON MESSIAH!!!!


WYRD WAR is proud to herald the triumphant return of Siki Spacek and Black Death Resurrected! The first LP since Black Death's legendary 1984 debut is a 40-minute odyssey of true-as-steel Cleveland Metal, featuring eight headbanging masterpieces written between 1983-2013 and delivered with the heart, conviction and fury of dirty inner city survivors! Recorded by Billy Morris, mastered by Timothy Stollenwerk and pressed to vinyl by your comrades at Wyrd War. Stay tuned. Stay heavy.

SWIFT METAL JUSTICE IS COMING SUMMER 2015!

Thursday, April 02, 2015

BASTARD SONS OF ETERNAL WYRD


For no particular reason at all, today I feel compelled to celebrate a very special artist and the man who created the insignia for my latest guerrilla enterprise, Wyrd War. If there’s any justice in the world or any integrity whatsoever remaining in the music and fine art industries, Joe Petagno will retire a wealthy man and a monolithic middle finger shaped runestone will be hoisted in his honor on the day he finally rides that white line to the vanishing point. At the very least he should be celebrated as a national treasure here in the U.S. with all the dubious fringe benefits that might come with such a distinction. Problem is, he split California for London in 1973 – eventually settling in Denmark where he resides to this day – and anyway most Americans are too dazed to recognize the intrinsic value of anything that doesn’t turn a quick buck. Not that Joe’s fantastic artwork hasn’t turned a quick buck. If the average biker rally and shithole dive bar are any indications, his work has certainly lined more than a few pockets over the past four decades. His snarling “Dog Face Boy” for Motörhead, probably his most well-known creation, has inspired generations of malcontents to find their voice and experience life on their own terms – bleeding ears and bruised knuckles be damned! Consider how insipid and wimpy your own flesh would be if it weren’t for that gnarly Snaggletooth tattoo which at some point in your life has a) gotten you laid, b) gotten you a complimentary Jack & Coke or c) gotten you fired from your bullshit job. The man and the beast are everywhere! That’s probably because the beast in man is everywhere. Joe’s iconic Snaggletooth prevails as an abominable insignia of the Wolf Age, conveying in a single glance the primeval paradox of the enflamed death head cock poised on the precipice of the cunt throat abyss. The luminous glare of the werewolf antihero is a challenge to stand up, hold fast and push forward. The fearful hesitate and are swallowed in the gaping jaws of disintegration. The rest of us march on. Force conquers inertia with a few measured slashes of the maestro’s brush, ere the world crumbles. The bastard son of eternal war is in your face...FOREVER!


Saturday, February 14, 2015

GAS, GRASS OR ASS













Goddamn, Portland! What a night! 1,000 people lined up around the block at 6pm and the fire marshal couldn't shut it down because the smart folks of See See's actually had their act together. Thanks to Emily, Thor, Michael, Paul and the rest of the ONE MOTORCYCLE SHOW crew for putting together such a spectacular event. Eventually the police did shut us down a bit earlier than planned due to 1% presence and paranoia that the Mongels and Gypsy Jokers might start trouble. But we still had our fun, did we not? Whew. My head hurts. Photos by Meadow and Rob Fornicator.

Saturday, December 27, 2014

LUCIFER'S GREEN INFERNO

The Aztec underworld, Mictlan, was said to be comprised of nine levels through which the souls of the dead traversed to their final resting place. It was a journey punctuated by nightmarish obstructions such as swirling rivers of blood, winds of flesh-rending daggers, ravenous jaguar spirits and pendulous mountain ranges that hovered and clashed like wrathful fists. It is appropriate then that our recent crusade south of the equator delivered the TEMPLE of WATAIN to six countries over the course of nine hellish days. As might be expected on such a wild hunt, we met many psychopomps along the way who illuminated our path and assisted our mission, some of whom you will meet in the intimate behind-the-scenes photos I have selected to share here. There were many more who chose to remain in the shadows. They know who they are, and so do we. To all of the brothers and sisters we met in the sultry and sinful lands of Mexico City, Central and South America, I humbly offer my deepest gratitude and respect. Until we meet again...



LUCIFER'S GREEN INFERNO (part one)





















All images © Dennis Dread and Watain
As with everything on this site, reposting anywhere for any reason without express authorization from Dennis Dread is theft and will be dealt with accordingly.

LUCIFER'S GREEN INFERNO (part two)























All images © Dennis Dread and Watain
As with everything on this site, reposting anywhere for any reason without express authorization from Dennis Dread is theft and will be dealt with accordingly.